2018-11-07 / Opinions & Letters

Homework

Midwest Memo
by Alan Shultz

In a couple weeks, the office where I work is scheduled to move. The move is back to our refurbished space one floor up from temporary offices where we are now. Per management, the remodeled space is said to have cost about $300,000. It’s all sleek and white and glass. There will be a fireplace and coffee bar and glass walled conference rooms and pods of shiny white common use tables and chairs. No one will have assigned desks. There will be no drawers or cubbies in which to keep personal property. Everything will be open and flowing with clean surfaces. From what I can tell, the only thing that could possibly mess up the work space would be actual people…working.

It all sounds very nice, except for one little thing. None of the agents who work out of this office asked for this new people optional set-up. No one asked that the cubicles disappear, that the desks be deconstructed, that individual hard line phones be eliminated, that all conversations become public and that we roam the entire workday like bison on the plains.

Personally, I would have preferred a Starbucks gift card to the $300K remodel.

Last week we got a memo about the move. A memo is a little thing, except that this memo read like an eviction notice. “Now is the time to take home the accumulation of personal property for which there will be no place in the new offices.” The memo went on to mention virtually everything I have on the top of my current desk. Tissue boxes - check; hand sanitizer - check; clock - check; file folders - check. The memo even mentioned “plastic storage tubs kept on the floor.” Yours truly is the only person to have said offending plastic storage tub. Check - and thanks for the “this one’s for you bud” custom reminder.

I am a paper hording worker in a paperless office where everything is stored in “the cloud.” I am a go to work worker in a home office working culture. Without intending to become one, I’ve turned into the office dinosaur.

But I’m on notice now - it’s just taken a bit of time to sink in.

Personally, I really value the old-fashioned concept of “going to work” and “coming back home.”

The physical separation of work and home has served me well. The prospect of working from home is far from appealing.

If I work from home, I will not necessarily work. But I will eat and I will clean. It’s that simple.

So soon after I lug home the tissue and the clock and the hand sanitizer, the files, and the office sweater and the granola bars, the mug of pens, the stapler and post-it notes, after I get them home and put away - I’ll be looking for “plan B.”

And when the firm and the office manager notice that the new office stays shiny and new because no one comes there, well, I guess that’s the way they wanted it. Delphi downtown parking

The diagonal parking works for the most part. It certainly provides more parking spots in the center of town. Whoever thought you’d have to actually look for a parking spot in Delphi on a weekend night? It’s a good problem.

But folks, a little tweaking is in order.

The diagonal parking really was designed for conventional automobiles, not extended cab pickup trucks.

Good luck backing out into the street if an extended cab parks next to you. Your visibility is zip until you clear the truck.

The most dangerous visibility issues associated with the extended cabs involve the end spots in a row of parking. The other day, coming from the Police Department, an extended cab was parked in the last spot on Main at Union. I had to pull half way out into Main Street to see if any traffic was coming from the east.

It’s time to get some “compact cars only” signs and plant them at the end parking spots adjacent to the intersections.

Otherwise….we’ve got some avoidable accidents waiting to happen.

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