Eric Haley is the pastor at Calvary Chapel Carroll County. Would not it be a wonderful thing if we had the type of safeguards on our tongues that we have on our email? Spell check would not really help much unless we were in a spelling bee but some kind of a phrase or word usage check would be nice. Having a chili pepper or two pop up before our eyes before the words come out might be very useful.

It is really impossible to speak and always know that our words are the right words for the moment or that our right words will be taken in the right way. It is a difficult thing to do as Ephesians 4:15 suggests, “speak the truth in love.” We often think that means we should never speak the truth unless we can say it in a loving sounding way. This leads us many times to not speaking the truth at all.

How many times have we heard the phrase, “Friends don’t let friends drive drunk?” But when it comes to stopping them is there a polite way to say, “Give me the car keys, your too drunk to drive?” I suppose we could come up with something more imaginative though disingenuous and say, “Why don’t you just relax in the back seat and let me take you home, after all, you have had a hard day and I have always wanted to drive your car?”

Maybe there is a middle ground approach to this scenario but with an impending risk of someone killing themselves and others, the best approach is one of immediate action, even though the words may sound a bit harsh.

I think one of the best examples of speaking the truth in love is found in Luke chapter 14. The story begins with Jesus being invited to a Sabbath dinner and ends with a whole bunch of people being offended. At least we assume they were offended because if it were us, we would certainly be offended.

At this dinner, Jesus addresses the hypocritical legalism of the Pharisees, the pridefulness of the guests seeking the best seats, the self-serving attitude of the host who only invited friends who would return the favor and the presumptuousness of a particularly vocal Jewish guest who thought he had a free ticket to eat bread in the kingdom of God.

We can imagine what the great multitudes outside the house were thinking. Perhaps things like, “Boy he sure told them. Get ’me, Lord!” But then Jesus spoke to them also about their half-hearted commitment.

Was Jesus speaking the truth in love? You bet! — in the deepest way. He was speaking the truth out of love, recognizing that in His eternal perspective, the attitudes displayed were as destructive as driving drunk.

Jesus was not the kind of person to recognize a path of destruction without warning all those who would listen. Friends do not let their friends go down that path. His compassion for all of mankind was and is too great for that.

When I read the words of the One who was full of grace and truth, I am often compelled to pray, “Lord, guard my tongue but never let me assume that you have sealed my lips.”