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Baby adoption - costly and priceless
"We're incomplete," Crystal said. They want a baby. They went through the whole process of infertility treatments, but still no baby. About six years ago, they started thinking about adoption. They consulted attorneys who are adoption specialists, looked into adoption agencies, and searched the Internet. They considered American adoption and foreign adoption. Their heads were swimming with the details of the very options - costs, amount and difficulty of paperwork, time involved in the process, etc. They discovered that adoption of an American baby is the most expensive and the most difficult. Through a family friend, they learned about an American-run orphanage in Guatemala. The orphanage and affiliated adoption agency in the U.S. were founded by an American couple who had been missionaries in Guatemala. The Grandstaffs researched the agency, Special Delivery International, and agreed that it was a good option for them. They started the process last September. "When you pick up the stack of paperwork, it's overwhelming," Tony said. "You just want to set it back down." But they persevered - with filling out document after document and at the same time, trying to accumulate the money needed for the high cost of adoption. They finished the paperwork in January, and were put on a waiting list. "We had to call the agency whenever we wanted to know where we were on the list," Crystal said. Finally they were No.1, and "their baby" was born May 3 - a girl with thick black hair. They now have an agonizing wait until they can pick her up in November. The orphanage sends monthly updates through email - including photos of the baby and health reports. The Grandstaffs have already named the baby - Anna Rene Jessica Grandstaff. They have a framed photo of her in their living room and they are getting the nursery ready. Crystal said there are so many couples in Indiana and Illinois who adopt through this agency that they have a yearly reunion. It was held this summer in Illinois, and the Grandstaffs were invited. It was at this reunion that they received a shock. A social worker who was a representative of the adoption agency asked the Grandstaffs if they wanted to adopt a baby boy, too. This baby also was born in May. He had low birth weight and some health issues and was rejected by the couple at the top of the waiting list. The Grandstaffs said they had talked about possibly adopting a baby boy sometime in the future, but never dreamed they would have that opportunity so soon. Crystal said she thinks they were asked about the second baby because they did not hesitate to adopt Anna, even though she had some health issues at birth also. The Grandstaffs decided that the double adoption was "meant to be," so they said "yes." They started the paperwork for the baby boy on June 30. The main concern this time, according to the Grandstaffs, is the money. They said adoption costs for Anna will total around $23,000. They have paid $11,000 already and will pay the rest when they pick her up. Other miscellaneous costs related to the adoption - including two trips to Guatemala, bring the total costs to around $28,000, they said. They planned for this, and with help from Crystal's mother, Barbara Bailey, they have the money for Anna. But now if they're to adopt the baby boy, they need to raise approximately the same amount again. If they're able to do so, they hope they can pick him up in Guatemala sometime after the first of the year. In anticipation, they've named him James Brody, and will call him Brody. Tony and Crystal are both employed. He works in the swine production industry, and she works at Logansport Memorial Hospital. Although Tony's parents, Jim and Sue Grandstaff, have offered to help financially, the family is still coming up short. Family members will host a benefit dinner for Tony and Crystal on Sept. 1 from 4 to 6 p.m. at the Burnettsville Community Center. It will be a hog roast, and free will donations will be accepted. Part of the extra costs associated with foreign adoption are for passports and travel expenses to the country of adoption. Crystal said the agency recommends one visit to the country prior to picking the baby up. This is not only to be able to see the baby in person but also so the naturalization process can begin. Crystal said the visit paves the way for the baby to become a U.S. citizen as soon as he or she is brought back to the states. The Grandstaffs just returned from their visit with both babies. "We stayed in an apartment at the orphanage and got to take total care of the babies for four days," Crystal said. "We fed them, bathed them, and got up in the middle of the night with them." "We spent the whole time with them except for three hours when we went to a nearby village to buy some gifts for them," Crystal said. "They're cooing and reaching out for things," she continued. "Brody likes his bath, but Anna doesn't." "Brody has filled out now, and both babies are very healthy," Tony said. Accompanying them on the trip were Tony's parents and his sister, Tammi Lavy, who is a registered nurse. "If you want to do something rewarding, visit and help at an orphanage or adopt an orphan," Tony said. Although the two adoptions still have to go through the Guatemalan courts and there are still some uncertainties ahead, the Grandstaffs are allowing themselves to have hopes and dreams for their children. Tony said he hopes someday they can go to college, but he says the most important thing is for them to be happy. The Grandstaffs say they want their children to know where they came from, and they will make sure they know about their Guatemalan culture. Tony and Crystal have been teaching themselves Spanish, but they say it is a slow process. They want their children to be bilingual. They hope they can take them back to Guatemala someday. But for now, they just want to get them to their new home. For more information on Special Delivery International, visit www.specialdelivery4kids.org. Benefit hog roast For Tony and Crystal Grandstaff Sat., Sept. 1, 4 to 6 p.m. Burnettsville Community Center Free will offering Donations can be sent to the Radnor United Methodist Church, 2690S 585W, Delphi, IN 46923. Write "The Grandstaff Adoption Fund" in the check memo. |
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